SHADE-O-METER RATING
3 OUTTA 5 WERKS: “NO SHADE, BUT SHE DIDN’T TURN IT OUT”
Where’s Beefcake’s? It’s in Boardwalk, which is in Wilton Manors. Boardwalk is an all-male strip club that offers “men for men entertainment.” Was there an age restriction? Yes. 18 and up. What was the décor and atmosphere like? American-Asian faux chic, with a bordello-ish whiff. The tables and chairs were stainless steel. The lighting consisted of faux paper lanterns, and there are neon accents about. Patrons can select music from a digital jukebox (which itself was a form of entertainment since one queen didn’t like what another queen was playing). What was the seating like? There was seating around the bar. There were also pub tables and regular tables. What was the crowd like? It was mostly locals, and they were in small groups. However, the crowd was friendly. We overheard the people next to us say that they were visiting. Was it cruisy? If you’re sitting at the bar, and the person next to you is single, this definitely seems like a possibility. The cruising factor likely diminishes if you’re sitting at a table.
When was happy hour? It’s from 3:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. What drinks were ordered? White wine and cosmopolitans. What were the prices? The happy hour prices were good. Sky martinis are $5. Were the drinks served timely? For the most part, yes. However, there was only one bartender. Service can be inconsistent if the bartender is subject to a rush of orders all at once. How were they? The wine was typical table wine. There was nothing special about the cosmo. But, then again, no one is likely going here for fine signature cocktails. What was on the menu? There was some typical bar food. However, the restaurant also offered traditional American cuisine, such as meatloaf and pot roast. What was ordered? Wings, one appetizer salad, and the Wednesday night hamburger special (which is advertised as “a big juicy thick mouthwatering piece of meat”). What were the prices? The “small house salad” was $3.95, the wings were $8.95 for six, and the hamburger special was $7.50.
Was the food served timely? No. The food was ordered at 8:10 p.m. The appetizer salad never came. We asked about it at 8:30 p.m., and then it was served about two minutes later. For some undisclosed reason, the burgers came about 10 minutes apart. The first burger was served at about 8:35 p.m. How was it? Although the salad was no high-end vegetarian delight, it was a step up from, for example, a worn-out salad that one might typically encounter at some diners. The hamburgers were cooked correctly (one medium rare, and one well-done), the meat was high-quality, and the fixin’s were aplenty. However, the French fires were nothing special—think Wendy’s. But they were served hot, which is essential. The wings were okay, but they weren’t particularly crispy, and one of the poor drumsticks looked like it came straight out of the set of The Walking Dead, complete with a jagged bone sticking right out of the side of it.
How was the service? For the most part, the “staff” (one bartender/server and one bar back) was friendly, attentive and knowledgeable. However, watch out Willie Loman, because “attention” was not consistently paid. For example, the leftover food was brought out in a to-go box at the end of the meal, but at least ten minutes after that, there was still no inquiry about the check or if service was complete. What stands out about the place? The mostly-locals vibe and the friendly nature of the bartender. What could be improved? If one is going to visually present a restaurant, then the food quality and service must be tantamount to the service of the liquor-pouring. What was surprising? The bartender had insect repellant.
Beefcake’s Bar & Grill is located at 1721 North Andrews Ave., in Wilton Manors, Florida. It’s open from 3:00 p.m. to 2:00 a.m. Monday through Thursday, and from 11:00 a.m. to 3:00 a.m. Friday through Sunday.
