HALLOWEEN HORROR NIGHTS 2018

SHADE-O-METER RATING

5 OUTTA 5 WERKS: “10s ACROSS THE BOARD – LEGENDARY STATUS”

By Mike Jeknavorian

What is Halloween Horror Nights (HHN)?  It’s the Halloween event at Universal Orlando.  This year’s event—the 28^thyear—had ten houses (for the first time ever), three scare zones, and one show.  Some of the rides were open as well.  The advertising campaign was built around the Stranger Things house, which was one of the main houses, and had a loose 1980s theme as well.  We went to the event on Sunday, September 23.  The event is open either from 6:30 p.m. to 1:00 a.m., or from 6:30 p.m. to 2:00 a.m.  It was open until 1:00 on the day we went.  How much was the parking?  We stayed at the Hard Rock Hotel, which is an on-site property.  The event is a five-minute walk from the hotel.

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Does the venue serve liquor?  Yes.  There were various stands, which serve beer, wine and specialty HHN drinks.  Some of the regular bars were open as well.  For example, the bar near the Jaws display was open.  How was the drink?  We got a double tequila on the rocks for $15, and a double chardonnay for $15.  They were fine.  Does the venue serve food?  There were food booths, and most of the regular restaurants were open as well.  Some of the restaurants in CityWalk, the entertainment and retail area outside of the park, were open as well.

How was the food?  We didn’t get any food at the event.  However, we got a pizza and caprese salad at Red Oven Pizza Bakery in CityWalk after the event.  The pizza was ok.  The caprese salad wasn’t so great.  How much were the tickets?  Depending on the night, if you buy the tickets online, they range from $62.99 to $83.99 (which is up $3 to $4 from last year).  However, if you want to see all the houses, you’ll have to get the front-of-the-line Express Pass.  With some of the lines at an hour or more, there is no other way to do it.  The Express Pass starts at $79.99—the same price as last year.

How was the Stranger Things house?  Although the preview video for this house was hands-down the best one—featuring the fabulous theme song, and with video of Universal going upside down, to reveal the Stranger Things realm below the park—the house itself was good, but not mind-blowing.  The house showcased the “Eleven” character several times, with her hand stretched out to do her psychokinesis.  Probably the best scene featured the Winona Rider character going nuts in her house, with Christmas lights everywhere and on the fritz.  Strangely the Barb character seemed to be missing from the house.

How was the Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers house?  This is the film where Michael Myers tries to kill Laurie Strode’s niece, culminating in the niece inheriting Myer’s killer instincts at the end of it.  The music, of course, was great.  Not so much, the house.  The best scenes featured the “Loomis” character and the niece, where the niece had the clown mask on and a knife in her hand.  The rest wasn’t particularly memorable.

How was the Poltergeist house?  Although the house featured strong imagery, it was strangely non-linear during parts of it—the house started with the end scene (“You left the bodies and you only moved the headstones!”).  The best sets were of that giant demon face coming at you out the “light,” skeletons in coffins, the steak moving across the counter (fabulous!), and Tangina directing you to “clear your minds.”  However, strangely, the film’s creepy theme song was absent.

How was the Trick ‘r Treat house? I saw this film once, and although I don’t remember being that crazy about, despite its accolades, the house was excellent.  When the maze began, you entered a house, which was spectacularly adorned with light pumpkins, and then you were greeted by the “Sam” character at the top of the stairs.  For the duration of the house, Sam and other characters from the film proceeded to taunt you.

How was The Horror of Blumhouse house?  This house featured scenes from the first The Purge film, and from Happy Death Day.  Although nothing quit rattles the nerves as hearing that “purge” siren, informing you that all crimes are legal, including murder, this was one of the weaker houses.  The better imagery was of ghostly apparitions and came from the Happy Death Day part.  How was the Carnival Graveyard: Rust in Pieces house? This house featured circus and carnival imagery from a “carnival” graveyard.  The sets were good enough, but the theme was obtuse.  This was one of the weaker houses.

How was the Dead Exposure: Patient Zero house?  The house was essentially a take on the film, 28 Days Later.  A virus turned people into zombies.  The best part was in the laboratory, at the beginning, where lunatic looking monkeys were going frantic in cages.  How was the Scary Tales house?  This house placed you in the land of the Wicked Witch of the West (according to the website).  In the maze, you were basically trapped and taunted in her range, and with no “fairytale ending” in sight.  The best effect was at the beginning, where the witch stood on the balcony of her castle, taking off on her broom over you, al la the assistance of a theatrical support wire.

How was Seeds of Extinction house?  This house was very dark, and I believe that it had outdoor elements as well.  The villains consisted of a hybrid of creatures that looked like Audry II from Little Shop of Horrors and the monsters from Stranger Things.  Once again, this was one of the weaker houses.  How was the Slaughter Sinema house?  This house was clever.  The house was predicated on three fictitious films, who’s trailers were screened in the line, including the mock-satanic film, Cult of Beast Baby.  The best effect was a room with the “beast baby” in it, where the lights dimmed and the baby’s eye were glowing red and starring at you.

How were the shows?  There was only one show this year—Academy of Villains:  Cyberpunk.  According to the website, the show is a mix of “dance, acrobatics and theatrics… with synths and neon lights.”  We didn’t see it.  How were the scare zones?  There were five: Revenge of Chucky (as in, Chucky, from the Child’s Play films), Killer Klowns from Outer Space (which was based on that film), The Harvest (which played on haunted barn imagery), Twisted Tradition, and Vamp’ 85: New Year’s Eve (with vampiric 80s pop stars).  They were all good, but the Chucky area was the freakiest.  Cabbage Patch looking dolls walking around with knives, as well as an adult baby in a diaper, if you can imagine.

What could have improved HHN?  More linear storytelling in some of the houses would probably improve them.  In addition, the themes in some of the non-movie houses were somewhat weak or clichéd (the zombie house comes to mind).  In addition, it’s time for houses that are based on the films It and The Ring.  Those are needed.  And the Blumhouse houses have run their course as well.  Ditch those.

What was surprising about it?  The houses are extremely long.  Longer than I remember.  Considering all the details that are in them, that makes them all the more impressive.

Universal Studio Orlando is located at 6000 Universal Blvd., in Orlando, Florida.  HHN is on select nights, through November 3.